When someone we love passes on, we are left with a myriad of emotions….sorrow, regret, misery, disbelief, uncertainty, sometimes anger, sometimes relief that they are no longer bound by suffering. Often, we question “why” and we try to understand. The truth is that we may never really understand why God chooses the time that each life comes to an earthly end. His ways are not our ways. And so we are left….clinging to memories and wondering what to do next.
In my own recent loss and pain, I have found a way to move through the days and weeks and months. I ask myself….what did this person mean to my life? How did this person impact me and on what level? What did I learn from this person being a part of my journey? And when I ask that question, I am able to ponder on all the goodness and richness of life that God so generously gave me with the gift of those precious people whom I have lost. Oh what a blessing they were to me! What beautiful memories I get the joy of carrying in my heart! What tremendous ways they shaped my life and helped me become who I am today! What precious, beautiful gifts they were! When I realize all of this and put my thoughts on these facts instead of on my sorrows, I am able to feel the joy in my heart again. They joy for the pleasure of knowing them. The joy for the memories we shared. The joy for the tears we cried. The joy for the lessons of life.
Life is a string of comings and goings. People weave into our lives through biology, through circumstance, through God’s divine purpose. Some stay a great while with us and we create bonds that death cannot break. Others are fleeting, but bring laughter and joy to our hearts just the same. Whatever the case, the loss is great. Our hearts break. Our tears fall. We question why. But on the other side of the grief comes hope. Hope for a tomorrow with a little less pain in our hearts, hope for the joy and blessing of memories, and hope that we will one day meet again.
Thank you God that you bring hope through our despair, comfort through our pain, and joy through our mourning.